NAH, unless of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH. Two of them are already married, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding. Or allow/support others doing the same. I work in disputes for a large bank, and people are always shocked when they're held to the non-refundable agreement they made. Yeah, that's a really weird plan. She was very nice and polite and very good with my granddaughter. ._9ZuQyDXhFth1qKJF4KNm8{padding:12px 12px 40px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM,._1JmnMJclrTwTPpAip5U_Hm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:40px;padding-top:4px;text-align:left;margin-right:28px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM ._24r4TaTKqNLBGA3VgswFrN{margin-left:6px}._306gA2lxjCHX44ssikUp3O{margin-bottom:32px}._1Omf6afKRpv3RKNCWjIyJ4{font-size:18px;font-weight:500;line-height:22px;border-bottom:2px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:8px}._2Ss7VGMX-UPKt9NhFRtgTz{margin-bottom:24px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP{border-bottom:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:2px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP:last-of-type{border-bottom-width:0}._2qAEe8HGjtHsuKsHqNCa9u{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);padding-bottom:8px;padding-top:8px}.c5RWd-O3CYE-XSLdTyjtI{padding:8px 0}._3whORKuQps-WQpSceAyHuF{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px}._1Qk-ka6_CJz1fU3OUfeznu{margin-bottom:8px}._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-weight:500}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb,._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-size:12px;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb{font-weight:400}.horIoLCod23xkzt7MmTpC{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:#ea0027}._33Iw1wpNZ-uhC05tWsB9xi{margin-top:24px}._2M7LQbQxH40ingJ9h9RslL{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px} They want me to use my savings that I have carefully planned out to pay for my college so that I can graduate without debt to pay for the bridal shower and wedding transportation. ._1QwShihKKlyRXyQSlqYaWW{height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:bottom}._2X6EB3ZhEeXCh1eIVA64XM{margin-left:3px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;padding:0 4px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;margin-left:0;padding:0 4px}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;box-sizing:border-box;line-height:14px;padding:0 4px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH,._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{display:inline-block;height:16px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-body);border-radius:50%;margin-left:5px;text-align:center;width:16px}._2cvySYWkqJfynvXFOpNc5L{height:10px;width:10px}.aJrgrewN9C8x1Fusdx4hh{padding:2px 8px}._1wj6zoMi6hRP5YhJ8nXWXE{font-size:14px;padding:7px 12px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y{border-radius:20px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:hover{opacity:.85}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:active{transform:scale(.95)} Quite simply no one can afford for her to attend. @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} She has a bachelors degree in Translation and Interpreting and a masters degree in Future Media and Journalism. And you have free meal and free booze! ju. Assuming that you don't weaponize the fact that she misses the wedding. My daughter and I were given a 6 oz. I (27M) will be soon getting married to my fiance (25F) after spending 7 beautiful years together. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. ._3oeM4kc-2-4z-A0RTQLg0I{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between} That way, they've used the money for one of the two scenarios for which it was offered whilst not gifting less money than they did for the siblings. Do not discuss anything about wedding planning with your p. Plan this thing with your fianc. Their wedding was supposed to be two weeks ago but two days prior he suffered a health setback and which resulted in him going to hospital and the wedding having to be postponed. .FIYolDqalszTnjjNfThfT{max-width:256px;white-space:normal;text-align:center} Woman's Fianc Uninvited To Wedding Because Relationship 'Invalid': AITA Life Woman Furious After Fianc Isn't Invited To Friend's Wedding Because Their Relationship Isn't 'Valid' by Ben Acosta SDI Productions / Getty Images Weddings are known for inducing so much stress. They've only got themselves to blame. "She ain't giving up without a MAJOR fight.". Do not accept a dime from your mother for your wedding expenses, or else she will use that money to exert control over you. An absolute blast. ._2cHgYGbfV9EZMSThqLt2tx{margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{width:75%;height:24px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-,._3Q7WCNdCi77r0_CKPoDSFY{background:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);background-size:200%;margin-bottom:16px;border-radius:4px}._2wgLWvNKnhoJX3DUVT_3F-{width:100%;height:46px} I did not argue with my sister because my best friend wasn't invitedI just wasn't sure how else to title this without it being too wordy. NTA as long as you arent upset if people who live faraway cant attend. That may be true if you go to court over it(im not a lawyer, so idk), but if you try to dispute it through your bank, you're gonna be held to the agreement you made, which likely only says that the deposit is non-refundable. Sounds like someone who doesn't plan ahead. What happens when you cant spend one of the most important days with someone you want to spend your whole life with? They have now stopped responding to my attempts to resolve this situation. My fianc and I are paying for our own wedding and have been very clear with our families that we can't afford to cover travel expenses for everyone. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human. Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. Therefore, we'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take. Lol. My fiance ( 23M) and I (23 F) are getting married in less than a month. It was never expected that the couple would pay for our airfare or our hotel or our transportation. Who on earth expects the bride and groom to pay for their flights? The list seems to just go on and on. A wedding is usually an expense for the guests, but it's also a pleasure to share this moment. What is your take on this situation? My sister-in-law, who lives on the other side of the country, is upset that we won't pay for her ticket and is now refusing to come to the wedding. In my free time, I love going to art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my friends. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. "Also likely spread many rumors. And his name is Crazy man. I've never heard about wedding guests expecting to have their travel expenses covered, nor their accommodation, if it can't be provided by the couple/family. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Run as fast as you can from this relationship and this family. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Press J to jump to the feed. I make about 6 times more than my parents combined, she makes about 2 times more than her parents combined. Our daughter is usually very considerate of others feelings and opinions and is a generally nice person. "To preface this, we only got engaged about 10 weeks ago and have plans for November 2021, but if there's still issues at the time we'll postpone." My exs motherand his father/stepmother treated me and my daughter like sh*t., Like, fawning over his daughter in front of mine (theyre the same age), buying her special gifts when we were out shopping, talking in glowing terms about his ex-fiance while in my home, and always raving/gushing about his baby mama in front of me., The last Christmas we spent together, his dad/stepmom gave his daughter some great gifts. AITA for not paying for my daughter's wedding after it was postponed? I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. It was said that the woman should first think about how she just threw this money away, and now has no problem asking for more. Skip to GTV: 10:00. For context, OP is getting married soon. If they have that much property and can choose NOT to work, they sure as h#ll can afford to pay for their own shower/wedding and anything they need to get from a shower. I told her this and she's not too happy to say the least. My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. She kinda agrees with it being a small wedding, though, she'd like to invite family members with which she hasn't even spoken in years (to quote her: "they're still family overall, it's not nice"). At that time we hadn't discussed the rules yet, we just knew it would be very strict. Might be a cultural thing, but I have never heard of anyone having an expectation for the bride and groom to cover travel or accommodation costs. Sounds complicated? They now own 3 homes as they just purchased a second rental property. AITA for paying for my son's wedding? Your account is not active. Please enter your email to complete registration. NTA~lotsofcache. But you also can't be upset with them for missing events. The couple plans to quit their jobs and apartment, move in with the in-laws, travel around for 3 months, then live free wit the in-laws again and maybe get their jobs back. The specialists revealed that this is not a very common occurrence, adding: The more common scenario is for couples to completely change their minds before the actual planning starts. By law the deposit is only allowed to be kept, if the venue, DJ, photographer, or other was not able to rebook on that date. Something people would spend $40K on and walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories. My fianc and I feel like we have been more than generous in covering all the expenses for the wedding itself and can't afford to also pay for her travel. Ive never been invited to wedding that included travel expenses. All the guests and family are on your side. Some users also suggested some ways out of how they could still save the paid money, but according to OP, that $5K is already a lost cause. Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of Wedding Planner Robin Weil. I always say have your wedding wherever you want, but dont expect everyone to travel far to attend. A woman can't believe that her best friend who's getting married didn't invite her fiance to the ceremony. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Concerns were raised about the relationship. The end result would be that she'd have about 55-60 guests from her side. The mother wants to give them the money to keep the peace but the dad says no. The extra guests cost would be 1 month's salary for her. Everything needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again. NTA. Background. 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