Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. We have it with us right here and now. And now you know that he can stop if he will! Click here for sample pages in .pdf format . We all know that the first 164 pages of the big book are the meat and potatoes this books first 164 is only 90 pages! The First 164 pages of The Big Book with lined pages opposite text for note taking. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. The alcoholic, his wife, his children, his in-laws, each one is likely to have fixed ideas about the familys attitude towards himself or herself. Nothing will help the man who is off on a spiritual tangent so much as the wife who adopts a sane spiritual program, making a better practical use of it. Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. Ask him if he thinks he has the answer. Liquor caught up with me much faster than I came up behind Walter. Make him feel absolutely free to come and go as he likes. Be quick to see where religious people are right. It's a way of life. I have a shadowy recollection of being in an airplane bound for New York and of finding a friendly taxicab driver at the landing field instead of my wife. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body. He found a total of 401 changes to the first 164 pages. Why not I? Then I ordered another cocktail. It will take time to clear away the wreck. When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! After one of those days of inferno, I wobbled from a hotel bar to a brokerage office. They want him to make a fuss over them. It is possible to have a full and useful life, though your husband continues to drink. When they talked of a God personal to me, who was love, superhuman strength and direction, I became irritated and my mind snapped shut against such a theory. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. Among them you will make lifelong friends. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. He is very much the actor. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. It hadnt even come to mind. This is important. These are the earmarks of a real alcoholic. Obviously, no rule can be laid down. He is under constant fear and tension- that makes for more drinking. If you both show a willingness to remedy your own defects, there will be little need to criticize each other. They are questions for each individual to settle for himself. Well be down., Two days later, a future fellow of Alcoholics Anonymous stared glassily at the strangers beside his bed. Let the alcoholic continue his program day by day. We must be willing to make amends where we have done harm, provided that we do not bring about still more harm in so doing. Some time passed, and confidence began to be replaced by cock-sureness. Were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldnt be life. This is perhaps difficult-especially discussing our defects with another person. For the 11 point font, Holidays in Ocean Alley is 36,200 words including the front matter and list of my other books at the back. But in most fields our generation has witnessed complete liberation of our thinking. Vinhedo. There was nothing to do but wait. The beginning of the Big Book has not been changed since 1939, but exactly how many pages does that consist of? Now, this house will hardly accommodate its weekly visitors, for they number sixty or eighty as a rule. They may be jealous of a God who has stolen dads affections. Your man should be on his mettle to make good. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. In this way you can set them on the right track without becoming critical of them. Finally, he can no longer work, his wife gets a divorce and he is held up to ridicule. Young people may be encouraged by this mans experience to think that they can stop, as he did, on their own will power. Most of us have entered the final stage with its commitment to health resorts, sanitariums, hospitals, and jails. Taking a commercial inventory is a fact-finding and a fact-facing process. Never mind the musty past; here sat a miracle directly across the kitchen table. Should I kill myself? Being possessed of a spiritual experience, the alcoholic will find he has much in common with these people, though he may differ with them on many matters. They said God made these things possible, and we only smiled. If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing. He probably has several alcoholics among his own acquaintances. Everyone became resigned to the certainty that I would have to be shut up somewhere, or would stumble along to a miserable end. That was in June, 1935. You will learn the full meaning of Love thy neighbor as thyself.. He trembles to think someone might have observed him. This involves a process of deflation. They often jeopardize their own positions by trying to help serious drinkers who should have been fired long ago, or else given an opportunity to get well. Now these are commonplace observations on drinkers which we hear all the time. For those who are unable to drink moderately the question is how to stop altogether. Then, in days, weeks, or months, a fresh outburst. We have indulged in spiritual intoxication. His wife is one of those persons who really feels there is something rather sinful about these commodities, so she nagged, and her intolerance finally threw him into a fit of anger. There were 134 "Musts" in the first and second editions of Alcoholics Anonymous. Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. As to them, his policy is undoubtedly sound, but he did not distinguish between such people and the alcoholic. Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution. He talked for hours. Yes, we had been faithful, abjectly faithful to the God of Reason. I went back to the bar. But drinking does complicate sex relations in the home. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Though a robust man at retirement, he went to pieces quickly and was dead within four years. Memorial Day Parade Near Me. We have made our demonstration, done our part. What is his basic trouble? Alcoholics Anonymous, also known as the "Big Book," presents the A.A. program for recovery from alcoholism. The text and page numbers are the same in both the 3rd edition and 4th edition of The Big Book. Usually the family should not try to tell your story. While the program is considered a suggested method for dealing with the disease of Alcoholism, there are places within the Big Book where the authors used the word MUST. The following is a list of the 40 Musts from the Big Book. Simply we tell him that we will never get over drinking until we have done our utmost to straighten out the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. I honestly doubted whether, on balance, the religions of mankind had done any good. I reasoned I was not so far advanced as most of you fellows, that I had been usually successful in licking my other personal problems, and that I would therefore be successful where you men failed. He thought all alcoholics should constantly have chocolate available for its quick energy value at times of fatigue. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. We avoid hysterical thinking or advice. Their services are often indispensable in treating a newcomer and in following his case afterward. In any event, try to have your husband read this book. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. If he shows interest, lend him your copy of this book. What about people who proved that man could never fly? Though you may be able to stop for a considerable period, you may yet be a potential alcoholic. Certainly I was interested. The minute we put our work on a service plane, the alcoholic commences to rely upon our assistance rather than upon God. Then faith would be dead indeed. Some will moderate or stop altogether, and some will not. Therefore, we are not to be the hasty and foolish martyr who would needlessly sacrifice others to save himself from the alcoholic pit. There was always one more attempt-and one more failure. I have not had a drink since. You say, Yes, Im willing. That didnt seem to bother me so I tried another.. Think of what you can bring to it. In fact, he may say almost anything if he has accepted our solution which, as you know, demands rigorous honesty. He will feel he can deal with you without being nagged by his family. He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own. Small wonder many in the medical profession have a low opinion of alcoholics and their chance for recovery! Impressed by those who visited him at the hospital, he capitulated entirely when, later, in an upper room of this house, he heard the story of some man whose experience closely tallied with his own. But dad doesnt give freely of himself. Let the doctor, if he will, tell him he has something in the way of a solution. As a class, alcoholics are energetic people. After satisfying yourself that your man wants to recover and that he will go to any extreme to do so, you may suggest a definite course of action. Tell him some of the interesting stories you have read. I visited Winchester Cathedral. The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism. My intellectual heroes, the chemists, the astronomers, even the evolutionists, suggested vast laws and forces at work. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasnt done so yet. We know but few instances where we have given these doctors a fair break. He wasnt himself. When we see a man sinking into the mire that is alcoholism, we give him first aid and place what we have at his disposal. We realize that we have been giving you much direction and advice. Death was often near. I was staring at an inch of the tape which bore the inscription XYZ-32. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death. But the actual or potential alcoholic, with hardly an exception, will be absolutely unable to stop drinking on the basis of self- knowledge. Furthermore, Adobe has removed this feature from Acrobat Reader version X released in late 2010. Maybe the doctor has been called in, and the weary round of sanitariums and hospitals has begun. They should wait for the end of his next drinking bout. Thus mother, through no fault of her own, became accustomed to wearing the family trousers. This was the finish, the curtain, it seemed to me. The problems of the community might engage attention. They struck the children, kicked out door panels, smashed treasured crockery, and ripped the keys out of pianos. Then a mental fog settled down. Our activities in behalf of women who drink are on the increase. We were burned up.. So we think that unless some good and useful purpose is to be served, past occurrences should not be discussed. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Subscribe to our newsletter to receive the latest news, blogs, and so much more! But at least he will understand the problem and will no longer be misled by ordinary promises. Is he not unconsciously trying to see what he can take from the family life rather than give? If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We alcoholics are undisciplined. If not, why waste time with him? Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Let them remember that his drinking wrought all kinds of damage that may take long to repair. He will wish for the end. No words can tell of the loneliness and despair I found in that bitter morass of self-pity. That was natural, but let us think a little more closely. Thats a common form of trouble too. If you take it, your past will be forgotten and the fact that you went away for treatment will not be mentioned. Remember they are very ill. Life will take on new meaning. There is, however a vast amount of fun about it all. High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. You can secure their confidence when others fail. The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. He humbly offered himself to his Maker then he knew. We know what you are thinking. But the policy of this company is not to interfere with the habits of our employees. Others came near putting Galileo to death for his astronomical heresies. Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. You are saying to yourself: Im jittery and alone. Have there been any significant changes in the first 164 pages? Whether you are a hard drinker, a moderate drinker or a teetotaler, you may have some pretty strong opinions, perhaps prejudices. Up to this point you would label him as a foolish chap having queer ideas of fun. I couldnt do that. But you can. Without embracing the literature, success in AA is difficult. We read wordy books and indulge in windy arguments, thinking we believe this universe needs no God to explain it. It may be that both will decide that the way of good sense and loving kindness is to let by-gones be by- gones. WHOSE BOOK IS THIS? His ways of thinking and doing are the habits of years. 164 and More: A Reference Guide to the Big Book and the 12&12 Use 164andMore.com to search the Big Book and the 12&12. His coming was an oasis in this dreary desert of futility. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Includes pages 1-164 and: - The original Foreword - The Doctor's Opinion - Dr. Bob's Story - If you can't find the passages cited in your Big Book, try the provided chapter/story name as an aid. He admitted he was overdoing these things, but frankly said that he was not ready to stop. We shall bring to the task our combined experience and knowledge. 12-a. how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book. I was shocked, but interested. God didnt do it. It was the end of a perfect day, not a cloud on the horizon. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch of your drinking career up to the time you quit. My writhing nerves were stilled at last. Are the stones properly in place? We must not shrink at anything. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. Though our decision was a vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before. His call to the clergyman led him presently to a certain resident of the town, who, though formerly able and respected, was then nearing the nadir of alcoholic despair. But there exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding which is indescribably wonderful. Perhaps he goes to a doctor who gives him morphine or some sedative with which to taper off. Big Book content exclude its stories. The first 164 pages explain the alcoholic problem and how to solve it. The expression on the faces of the women, that indefinable something in the eyes of the men, the stimulating and electric atmosphere of the place, conspired to let him know that here was haven at last. Its strong language-but isnt it true? In this book you will read the experience of a man who thought he was an atheist. But cheer up, something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics. Here they are: AMONG MANY employers nowadays, we think of one member who has spent much of his life in the world of big business. Trembling, I stepped from the hospital a broken man. We have listed the people we have hurt by our conduct, and are willing to straighten out the past if we can. For myself, I had adopted those parts which seemed convenient and not too difficult; the rest I disregarded. To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. We think we are sensible when we urge that you stop this waste and give your worthwhile man a chance. And we, who have imposed on the best of employers, can scarcely blame them if they have been short with us. An all night place supplied me with a dozen glasses of ale. All sections of this country and many of its occupations are represented, as well as many political, economic, social, and religious backgrounds. As I'm writing this 2011 Buick Regal Service Manual book has my utmost attention and it's one the most detailed ebooks that I have got online. We think it dangerous if he rushes headlong at his economic problem. He will have no further reason for covering up an alcoholic employee. You can see that he is mentally and physically sick. Love and tolerance of others is our code. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. If he has your will power and guts, he will make the grade.. If a man drinks so much that his job suffers, we fire him. We remembered always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly nor to be despised and loathed. For he knows he must be honest if he would live at all. Search out another alcoholic and try again. First Edition of the Big Book. Even if you feel your organization has no alcoholic problem, it might pay to take another look down the line. How many pages is the AA Big Book? One of these men, staff member of a world- renowned hospital, recently made this statement to some of us: What you say about the general hopelessness of the average alcoholics plight is, in my opinion, correct. Only thirty years later the conquest of the air was almost an old story and airplane travel was in full swing. I went to my hotel and leisurely dressed for dinner. The drive for success was on. The 164 and More Book, eBook, and Web Site are all CONCORDANCES which display passages from the Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous, the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and the A.A. Grapevine (A.A. Preamble only). He gets a thrill out of skipping in front of fast-moving vehicles. The old pleasures were gone. As a celebrated American statesman put it, Lets look at the record.. This time I had not thought of the consequences at all. Many of our husbands were just as far gone. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. Can he talk frankly with you so long as he does not bear business tales or criticize his associates? To accomplish that purpose, the Big Book is divided into two main parts. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. This went on endlessly, and I began to waken very early in the morning shaking violently. Because it helped so many people recover, the Alcoholics Anonymous organization did not change it. When, however, the perfectly logical assumption is suggested that underneath the material world and life as we see it, there is an All Powerful, Guiding, Creative Intelligence, right there our perverse streak comes to the surface and we laboriously set out to convince ourselves it isnt so. Our fears fall from us. (Click here to read them). We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. This combination soon landed me on the rocks. Barriers which have sprung up between you and your friends will disappear with the growth of sympathetic understanding. In that case he is going to wonder how you can add anything to what he already knows. He knew he faced another trip to the asylum if he kept on. This experience may come to you. Because this book has become the basic text for our Society 5-b. Give him a chance to think it over. We may lose our position or reputation or face jail, but we are willing. If we are sorry for what we have done, and have the honest desire to let God take us to better things, we believe we will be forgiven and will have learned our lesson. We meet frequently so that newcomers may find the fellowship they seek. If you are sure your man does not want to stop, he may as well be discharged, the sooner the better. Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book First 164. Another feeling we are very likely to entertain is one of resentment that love and loyalty could not cure our husbands of alcoholism. Second Edition of the Big Book. Passing all understanding is the patience mothers and wives have had with alcoholics. So we clean house with the family, asking each morning in meditation that our Creator show us the way of patience, tolerance, kindliness and love. Many a man, yet dazed from his hospital experience, has stepped over the threshold of that home into freedom. He added that occasionally in the night a vague craving arose which would be satisfied by candy. While you were drinking, you were withdrawing from life little by little. Alcoholics are being attracted from far and near. Favorite Passages in the Big Book There are four editions of the Big Book. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. We have struck out viciously. Of course our friend was wrong-dead wrong. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents- anyone can increase the list. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. The Big Book - first 164 pages. They were deeply religious people, much shocked by their sons refusal to have anything to do with the church. No-not now. That was a hard thought. How is that to come about? you ask. His change of heart was dramatic, convincing, and moving. 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